Why Trauma Recovery Isn't a Straight Line

Here's what they don't tell you about healing from trauma:

It's not actually about moving forward all the time.

It's about learning to navigate a path that loops back on itself, and finding peace with that reality.

The linear lie

Our culture loves a good comeback story. The hero's journey. Rock bottom to redemption. Three acts with a satisfying resolution.

This narrative is so ingrained that we expect healing to follow the same arc. Start broken, do the work, emerge whole. Progress should be measurable. Steps should be forward. Setbacks are failures.

Except trauma doesn't read the script.

Real healing looks more like an M.C. Escher drawing than a straight highway. You climb the same staircase over and over, each time from a different angle, each time seeing something new.

Dr. Judith Herman figured this out decades ago when she developed what's now known as the Triphasic Model of Trauma Recovery. It's become the gold standard for understanding how people actually heal, not how we think they should.

The three stages (that aren't really stages)

Herman's model breaks trauma recovery into three phases:

Stage 1: Safety and Stabilization Creating a sense of physical and emotional safety. This means learning to regulate your nervous system, establishing boundaries, and building coping skills that actually work.

Stage 2: Remembrance and Mourning
Processing the traumatic memories and grieving what was lost. This is the heavy lifting—feeling the feelings you couldn't feel then, making meaning of what happened.

Stage 3: Reconnection Rebuilding your relationship with yourself and others. Deciding who you want to be going forward. Creating a life that feels worth living.

Sounds linear, right? It's not.

The loop-back reality

In a lecture last year, Tim Black from Wounded Warriors Canada described trauma recovery as an "Escher Staircase." You're constantly moving between safety, remembrance, and reconnection as needed during the healing process.

One day you're feeling confident and reconnected, planning your future. The next day, a smell triggers a flashback and suddenly you're back to square one, learning to feel safe in your own body again.

This isn't failure. This is how healing actually works.

When new emotions surface during remembrance work, returning to safety isn't regression—it's wisdom. When past events emerge during reconnection that you didn't even know were there, circling back to process them isn't starting over—it's going deeper.

The perfectionist's nightmare

If you're someone who measures worth through achievement, this model will drive you crazy.

There are no grades. No graduation ceremony. No moment when you can say "trauma recovery: complete" and move on with your life.

The research on Post-Traumatic Growth shows that many trauma survivors actually become stronger and more resilient than they were before. But they don't become immune to being triggered. They don't transcend their humanity.

They just get better at navigating the staircase.

Why we resist the loop

Society trains us to see backward movement as failure. In business, declining numbers mean you're losing. In fitness, moving less weight than last week means you're getting weaker. In school, failing to advance to the next grade means you're not smart enough.

But healing operates by different rules.

Sometimes the most profound growth happens when you consciously choose to step back and regroup instead of pushing forward for the sake of progress.

The Window of Tolerance concept in trauma therapy teaches us that there's an optimal zone for processing difficult material. Push too hard and you get overwhelmed or numb. Don't push enough and you stay stuck.

Skilled healers—whether therapists or your own inner wisdom—learn to recognize when it's time to advance and when it's time to retreat.

The spiral up

Here's what's beautiful about the Escher Staircase:

Even though you're covering familiar ground, you're doing so from a higher vantage point each time.

The safety skills you learn in your second pass through Stage 1 are more sophisticated than the first time. The memories you process in your third visit to Stage 2 go deeper than previous rounds. Your attempts at reconnection become more authentic, more boundaried, more genuinely you.

Trauma-informed research shows that healing isn't about forgetting or "getting over it." It's about developing a different relationship with your experience. The goal isn't to eliminate triggers—it's to respond to them with greater choice and less reactivity.

When progress looks like retreat

Think about the last time you would have benefited from stepping back and regrouping instead of moving forward for the sake of progress.

Maybe it was pushing through a difficult conversation when your nervous system was already activated. Maybe it was forcing yourself to "be social" when you really needed time to process. Maybe it was trying to forgive before you'd allowed yourself to feel the anger.

Our culture rewards forward momentum so strongly that we've forgotten retreat can be strategic. In martial arts, stepping back creates space and perspective. In military strategy, tactical retreat allows regrouping for a more effective advance.

In trauma recovery, honoring the need to loop back isn't giving up—it's growing up.

The long game

The Escher Staircase model asks us to trade the fantasy of linear progress for something more sustainable: the wisdom to move at the pace your system can handle.

This doesn't mean staying comfortable or avoiding growth. It means learning to distinguish between productive challenge and overwhelming pressure. It means trusting your internal compass over external expectations of how fast you "should" be healing.

Research on neuroplasticity shows that the brain changes throughout our entire lives. There's no expiration date on healing. There's no statute of limitations on growth.

The staircase will always be there. The question isn't whether you'll need to loop back—it's whether you'll judge yourself when you do.

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Trauma Recovery Support in Victoria, BC

At the Scriven Program, we understand that trauma recovery doesn't follow a linear path. Located in Victoria, British Columbia, and serving clients virtually across Canada, our practice specializes in helping people navigate the spiral of healing without judgment or pressure to "move faster."

Our trauma-informed services include:

• Individual support using the Triphasic Model of trauma recovery

• Coaching for recognizing when to advance and when to strategically retreat

We provide the safe container you need to heal at your own pace, honoring both your courage to face difficult material and your wisdom to step back when needed.

Your healing journey is unique, and your pace is perfect.

Contact Jason Scriven to learn how trauma recovery support in Victoria, BC can help you navigate your own Escher Staircase with skill, compassion, and respect for your own timing.